I have spent several posts talking about different topics related to grief, and I am going to spend at least one more entry on it.
One of the things that I really struggle with when someone important to you dies is how quickly it seems like the rest of the world just moves on. Here you are, trying to make sense of the death, trying to make sense of the world, trying to make sense of anything, and it seems like everyone around you is living like nothing ever happened. It makes me worry that others are not taking the time to grieve and mourn like I am. It can be a very sad way of thinking.
What I have to remember, though, is that everyone grieves differently. And, everyone grieves for different people or relationships. After all, how many people do I know that have lost someone, and they probably couldn’t understand why people like me continue to move on with life like nothing ever happened? That perception can go both ways.
I think the key here is compassion, and what I am talking about is only one small part of compassion. It includes accepting where you are in your grief process and also understanding that others might be in a different place in their grief. Looking at the bigger picture, everyone you interact with probably grieves certain things or people, so in some ways, we are really all in the same boat. I am using this situation as a reminder to be compassionate to everyone, because I do not know what grief they carry with them. I have to get better at remembering that the feelings I have may be my own, but in general they are feelings that other people have too. And, that alone can also help in processing grief.