No matter what your relationship to depression is, living with it or around it can present difficulties. One of those challenges is about what activities you can and can’t do because of the depression. You may find yourself saying, “I will take that class when so and so is feeling better”, or “I will go on the trip once my depression has lifted”. In some cases, those statements may make a lot of sense, but today I want to challenge anyone affected by depression in some way to really look at what they want to do and decide if the depression has to stop them from doing so.
Here’s the thing – life is short, and there is not much value to pretend to make plans for something that is not going to happen. Worried about leaving a depressed family member so you can travel? Could that family member go with you? Are there other friends or family that could look after the person while you are gone? Are there respite services available that you could use?
If you are depressed yourself, can you imagine things you have always wanted to do? If not, that is ok. If you can, however, what does that look like? Although you may not be feeling the best right now, can you begin taking some steps to make it happen once you are feeling better? Could part of what you want to do involve different treatments for your depression that may work better than what you are doing now?
I understand that my view might be seen as overly optimistic, but when my dad was depressed I know we hesitated to do anything – travel, celebrate anything, or even enjoy ourselves around him. I know now that this hesitation was not fair to anyone. Life has so much to offer, and we need to continue to make those experiences happen. Hesitate less and live more.