While I can’t speak about the rest of the world, here in the United States it seems like we are obsessed with “being happy”. We want to be happy, and we want those that we care about to be happy too. What exactly does “being happy” mean? I think you can find many different answers for a definition, but part of that definition seems to include the idea that we should be happy all of the time. Today, I want to share that I think being happy all of the time is not realistic, nor is it healthy.
In the recent history of my life, I have been bothered by the idea that I am not happy all of the time. Why shouldn’t I be happy I ask myself – I really do have it all in most respects. But, try as I might, I get sad or angry or mad, and it happens more than once a week. Then, when I haven’t “been happy”, I have felt bad about not being all sunshiny all of the time! And so the downward spiral goes. However, I am starting to recover from this.
It’s time to get real. Being happy all of the time is not ideal. We are all humans, and we all have a wide array of feelings. As long as we are not hurting others or ourselves, it is ok to feel what we feel and roll with it. We all need to lose the pressure to be happy all of the time, because life is simply not built that way. So, give yourself the permission to feel what you need to, and be happy when it makes sense to you.
If you are dealing with depression in any way, no doubt the pressure to “be happy” is way larger than what the rest of us face. But, the same goes for you as well. You will be happy when you can. It can take time to get into recovery and feel some joy again, and that is ok. No one should pressure you to just “be happy and get over it”. Let’s all give ourselves a break, and let’s just feel the variety of emotions that humans were meant to feel.