Category: General

My husband and I recently went on a trip to New York City.  I had been there 10 years ago on a solo trip, but I was longing to get back again after really enjoying the city my first time there.  We got to experience so much on the trip, and depending on how I feel I may devote more than one blog entry to my experiences related to the trip.

Today, I want to focus on the idea of New York City and what it means to me.  When I was growing up, my perception was that New York City was very scary and very dangerous.  There would be no reason for me to go there.  But somehow, as I watched movies that took place there and songs that were sung about it, I was always attracted to this city.  Could it really be that bad?  I was left to wonder until I got to make a trip on my own.

As it turns out, New York City is probably one of the safest cities out there.  On my first visit and on this recent one, I felt safe most of the time.  And, while safety is important, the best part of New York City to me is how it makes you feel.  There is so much to see and do, and there is an energy there that you can not explain to anyone.  You have to go and feel it for yourself.  It is an energy that anything is possible.  Any idea is welcome.  Any creativity is celebrated.  That is what I love about New York City – a beautiful sense that this is where things happen.  If you ever get the chance, I encourage you to visit – I suspect that you will not be disappointed once you experience the energy and inspiration.

Recently, I attended a “White Coat Ceremony” for a college of pharmacy class – in this case, the class of 2021.  When I started pharmacy school in 2002 I also attended one.  I am sure this is done for other professions and at other schools, but essentially it is a way to welcome students into the training of their chosen profession.  In the ones I have attended, each student is coated with a white lab jacket as a way to symbolize their entry into their studies.  It can be a very big moment for students.  For me, it was a way to say that all of my hard work and dedication were paying off – assuming I continued to work hard and study, I would be a pharmacist.  The competition, although still somewhat there, was lessened quite a bit as well.  Once you were in pharmacy school there was a strong support system to make sure you made it through, and I was happy to be accepted.

I have been to a white coat ceremony for the last three years, and I am always amazed at how inspiring it is for me.  I go because I mentor some of the pharmacy students, and it is wonderful to see how engaged and professional these students seem to be.  Going to this event gives me hope for our future health care providers.  Currently, I think a lot about our current health care system is broken, and my hope is that these students will pave the way for something better.  And, while I don’t think a pill is the answer to everything, I do think pharmacists can have a major impact on education and coaching patients.  The role of a pharmacist is expanding, and I look forward to seeing how it evolves in these future classes.  Overall, the white coat ceremony is a wonderful way to celebrate an important milestone in the life of a student.

Although this comes up from time to time, lately it seems there have been several people in our local area that we know that are in trouble with the law.  It is a weird feeling because until you hear about civil or criminal charges or allegations against someone, you just assume (or, at least I do) that the person is honestly and morally going about their days.  I’m not here to judge – that is certainly not my place.  But, it sometimes feels like you have been betrayed by the person.  What you thought you knew isn’t correct.

Have you experienced something like this before?  Maybe it wasn’t an example where the person ended up being sued or in jail, but maybe you found out someone wasn’t the person you thought they were.  I suspect that has happened to most of us, especially the older we are.  How did you feel?  What, if anything, did you do about it?  It can be hard to make these realizations, and I also wonder sometimes if people have any intent of deceiving others.  I am sure some do, but again, that probably starts getting into the judgment I don’t believe I should be doing.

Then, of course, if someone can do that to you, you can most certainly deceive others as well.  This is the part I feel I can do something about, or, at least my intentions can be transparent.  Unfortunately, we probably deceive others even if we don’t mean to do so.  But, I can choose to be as intentional and honest with others as I can.  If something worrisome is going on, I can be honest about it with others too.  All easier said than done, but my overall ask of myself is to be as real with others as I can, and I encourage you do to the same.

Do you remember CDs (aka Compact Disks)?  Do you still own any?  Do you actually play any CDs that you still have?  I have to say that even though most music is digital these days, I am still a big fan of the CD.  I also really enjoy cassette tapes and records.  There is something about just holding the music in your hands that sometimes makes it seem more real.

Right now, I am taking some CDs that are new to me and ripping them onto my computer so I have a digital copy of them.  Why do I do this if I like CDs so much?  I do it because sometimes I will wear out CDs from playing them so much.  Also, it makes sense that the digital files aren’t as bulky to carry around when you are on the go.  Even though I have to go through this process to make my music more portable I still enjoy buying and playing CDs.

Doing this also makes me think of my dad.  Back when I was little, he took all of his records and recorded them onto cassette tapes.  After CDs came out, he essentially just bought the CD version of the records he had.  So, at one point, I remember my dad having 3 formats for the same music.  Instead of thinking it was a waste, I thought it was pretty cool.  This was a guy who loved music so much, and today I still share that love with him.  So, I will be buying CDs as long as I can.  But, I probably will also rip them, because even though I love the past, I still try to live in today.

How about you?  Do you have a favorite type of music format?  If so, what can you play and enjoy today?

Would you describe yourself as a perfectionist?  Today, I would say that I am a recovering one.  I am not sure if it is anything I will ever completely be free of, but I like to think that my perfectionist tendencies have decreased and continue to do so.  And, while there are those who might think perfectionism is something to strive for, I am posting today about how dangerous I think perfectionism can be for your wellness.

To start off, what does it mean to be “perfect” anyway?  Who decides?  You?  The people in your life?  That is already a check mark against perfectionism – if everyone thinks it means something different it might be hard to attain.

Next, perfectionism can take up a lot of time and decrease productivity and efficiency.  If you are paying attention to every little detail and making it “perfect” in your mind, how do you ever get anything done?  Also, what else are you missing out on when you work on making something perfect?

Then, how does this process make you feel?  Do you get a sense of accomplishment?  Or, does it never seem good enough?

Lastly, if everything is perfect, do you learn anything from it?  A lot of times the greatest learning comes from mistakes we make along the way – not that we shouldn’t do our best, but there is a line between completing a task and trying to make it perfect.

Overall, to me it seems that perfectionism has many down sides, and I hope the questions above have you thinking that perfectionism is not the answer.  Give your best with what you have, but let go of that perfectionist ideal.  In reality, life is messy, and it is certainly not perfect for anyone.   Spend your time working on a life that is meaningful, messy, and real instead of one that is “perfect” in your mind.

Are you a planner?  Do you enjoy looking ahead at the next day, week, month, or year and scheduling events or thinking about what lies ahead?

I am a very big planner.  As long as I can remember, I have always had a planner and/or calendar to keep track of assignments, projects, appointments, and meetings, among other things.  These days, my calendar is electronic and shared with my husband, and to-dos usually end up on a notebook I keep in my purse.  Regardless of how it gets done I secretly enjoy the sense of “keeping it together” with these items.

Lately, however, I am beginning to wonder if I spend too much time planning.  Is that possible?  I think so.  I am wondering how it may take me away from more important things, like family, friends, and just living life.  Maybe I am not missing any major things, but what small things am I missing?  Am I missing playing with my child?  Am I a missing a conversation with my spouse?  Again, probably smaller things, but still important things that make up a day…and a life.  My concern is that in planning so many things I forget to live in the moment.  I forget to just live.  So, one thing I would like to work on is spending less time planning and more time living.  And, I would encourage you to do the same.  Now, I understand some planning is necessary – bills have to be paid, food has to be obtained, children have to get to school, and so on.  What I am asking myself and others is to make sure we are not wasting precious time planning if it is not necessary.  Easier said than done, but I hope to make it a reality in my life.  How about you?  Do you feel the need to cut back on your planning?  What steps can you take today to live more and plan less?

On the day that I am writing this entry, it has been exactly 25 years since my Grandma Scott passed away.  Even though I won’t go into the details of how it unfolded from my point of view, I still remember it pretty vividly.  And, although I had lost a grandfather when I was in kindergarten, I didn’t totally understand what it all meant at that age.  I was sad, but I didn’t truly get it.  When my grandma passed away 25 years ago, I got it.  It was really the first major death that I had to process, and of course, it wouldn’t be the last.

I was very close to both of my grandmothers, so losing one was very hard.  I would lose the second grandmother a little over two years later.  Both of them had experienced prolonged illnesses before their passing, so I remember spending time in the hospital and/or long term care with them before they died.  It was some pretty tough stuff for a young girl.  I have spent a lot of my life wondering what they would have thought about my life in high school, college, my working life, getting married, and now having a child.  I feel like they would have been pretty proud, but they would have loved me no matter what I did.  Even to this day I still miss all of my grandparents very much (I also had a grandfather that passed away long before I was even born).

I share some of my background here because I felt that I got to spend a lot of time with my grandparents before they passed away.  After they all died, I have been pretty jealous of those people who still have grandparents.  I also get pretty mad at those who seem to take theirs for granted.  Of course, there may be legitimate reasons why people don’t get along with their grandparents, but assuming that is not the case I encourage you to spend as much time with them as possible.  Don’t take these individuals for granted, and enjoy the time you can spend with them.

I seem to be a woman who is interested in a wide variety of topics.  Some areas I know very well, but there are many where I know just a high level overview of the topic.  Sometimes I wonder if I should narrow down my focus and pick a few areas to pursue, but that doesn’t appeal to me.  As long as I don’t feel overwhelmed, why not explore what I can?

My latest interest has been looking at creativity.  I just finished a book on it, and I am currently listening to a college level course on the topic as well.  What I am learning about creativity is fascinating.  A lot of us out there, especially from the scientific and mathematical worlds, would say that we are not creative people.  I know I have touched on this in previous posts, but everyone is creative, and it isn’t totally something you are born with.  Creativity is a skill that can be developed, and that is exciting news for all of us.

The material has also discussed characteristics of creative people and ways to enhance your creativity.  You might be surprised at what it takes to be creative.  And, of course, there is no one right way to do it.  There are many combinations of characteristics and skills that can help you become a more creative individual.

Since there are many ways to be creative, I am not going to make any lists here.  However, some questions remain – in what ways are you creative?  If you don’t feel like you are a creative person, how might you develop this skill?  I hope that no matter what you do in life, you can embrace that idea that you are a creative being.  I also encourage you to examine what you currently do and see where you are already creating something.

For any of you that know me well, you know that patience is not one of my defining characteristics.  It has always been something I have struggled with, and I definitely acknowledge it as a weakness.  Over the last weekend I started to observe how that plays into my parenting, and boy, do I have some work to do.

My son is now at an age where he is getting into everything – which is totally normal.  He is exploring the world around him.  However, there are quite a few of those things that can be dangerous for him to explore, and one of my top jobs as a parent is to keep him safe.  Lately, I find myself saying “no” a lot, and sometimes I notice myself getting annoyed when I have to say “no” about every five seconds.  Surely there is something better than saying “no” all the time, and I really don’t like how I get frustrated.  I know, I am human, but I wish I had more patience with this.  It wasn’t the first time, and I know it won’t be the last.  And, I can’t hinder his exploration and learning with my lack of patience.

So, how to be more patient with my parenting (and in life, for that matter)?  That sometimes feels like my holy grail.  I think meditation and mindfulness can help.  And, while I think it is good for my son to wander and explore everything (with supervision) at this age, I am also thinking about creating more “safe spaces” (such as his crib), where I currently feel good that he will be safe if he stays in that area.  We have some gates up around the house, but maybe we need a few more.  This does not take away my responsibility to supervise him, but it might be a way to keep me from saying “no” over and over again.

Regardless of what happens, this is just one way that parenting is challenging me to be a better person.  It’s not always easy, but I am grateful for the opportunities to improve myself as a mother and as an individual.

A lot of companies require that employees complete yearly goals.  As a part of that, they also usually require a “mid-year check-in” to look at progress and make sure the employee is on track to meet the goals that have been established.  While I hadn’t formally completed goals for this year (I kind of like the idea of SMART goals, but I hate creating them), I did create a list of things I would like to do as well as have a theme for the year.  Since we are now halfway through the year I thought I would reflect on my progress so far.

Looking first at the tough side – 2017 has been a brutal year so far.  The loss of my mother-in-law tops the list obviously, but I have also had some really tough situations related to work.  On top of that, we have had a lot of issues related to our house, and with that has come some financial pressure.  We are very fortunate that we will be able to rise above most of this and be fine, but there is at least one loss here that you don’t just “get over” in my opinion.

Despite these challenges and losses, when looking at my list, I am happy to say that I have been able to check a few things off of it already.  There are also many that are in progress that should be completed by the end of the year.  Of course, some of these are subjective, but I am feeling a good sense of accomplishment here.  Also, if you may recall, my theme for the year is “creation”.  So far, I am trying to remember that as I go through my days, and I feel like my understanding and appreciation for all that we create has increased.  However, as I reflect on my theme, I realize how I want to create so much more – more time with friends and family, more ways to help people, more writing, more teaching – the creation is never ending.  So, I have a lot of work to do in the 2^nd half of 2017, and I hope to continue to share my journey with you.