Category: General

As we begin a new year, I wanted to reflect on 2019 and look ahead to 2020.  Specifically, I wanted to share my “word of the year” for 2020, because at this time that sounds way more fun than making resolutions.  I am not a big fan of resolutions anyway.  Honestly, I can’t remember if I have done this before, but for 2020, my word is going to be: connection.  Let me tell you why.

As we wrap up 2019, I am concerned by how empty and alone I feel.  That probably sounds unlikely coming from me and knowing that my life is full of many wonderful and meaningful things.  Truly, I am a very fortunate woman.  But, when I say empty and alone, it isn’t all about one particular person, place, or thing.  That is where “connection” comes into play.  I feel like I have lost connections to people, places, things, activities, goals, values, etc. that are important to me.  How did I get so lost?  When did life become just getting things checked off of a list? 

So, for me, I am going to work on creating or improving the connections in my life.  And, the beauty of this is that it doesn’t mean I have to work harder or more.  It may mean I let go of some things or change how I interact with someone or something.  Connection can be liberating, and I am looking forward to a more meaningful and purposeful year.

When shifting this topic to mental health in general, connection is key.  In fact, I know of at least one book that discusses how depression can be linked to lost connections to nature, relationships, meaningful work, etc.  When we think about our mental well-being, connections are a factor in how we feel.  As we head into 2020, I encourage you to look into your connections and how they may be affecting your mental health.  You might be surprised to see connections between your connections.

As I write this entry, we are almost at 7 years since my dad became a victim of suicide.  It has almost become a tradition that I reflect on this every year, and this time is no exception.  Let’s get to it.

As with every year that has passed since my dad’s death, there have been some major life events that have went on without him.  Thinking about my life alone, I have switched jobs, and I just had a surgery.  I have also went on several trips and have gotten to see and learn more about the world.  Casting the net even wider, my dad also has a new granddaughter this year, and I can only imagine how much he would have loved holding his third grandchild.

There are the big events, and then there are all the little things that make up our lives.  There has been a lot of laughter and some tears.  Some disagreements, and a lot of hugs and kisses.  Some days have been beautiful, others sad, but many times I catch myself wondering what my dad would have said if he had been here to see it all.

If there is anything different about this year, it is how this day has sort of snuck up on me this time – usually, once July hits I am thinking about his suicide more, but that hasn’t been the case.  I don’t think that changes much, but it is different.  I also seem to be in a phase where I can’t stop listening to Phil Collins, an artist that I listened to a lot with my dad.  I guess listening to Phil Collins makes me think I am hanging out with my dad again.

Overall, and as I would have suspected, 7 years does not make the grief any less.  It still sucks, and I will continue to carry that sadness with me.  I miss you Dad, and I love you.

Today I want to touch on something I have experienced, but until now I did not know it had terminology associated with it.  The topic is autonomous sensory meridian response, also known as ASMR.  While doing a quick internet search, I felt like I did not come up with a lot of reputable or scientific articles on the subject.  However, it is out in the world, so I will do my best to give you what I understand about ASMR.

According to Wikipedia, ASMR is an experience categorized by a static-like or tingling sensation on the skin that typically begins on the scalp and makes its way down the back of the neck and the upper spine.  ASMR includes the subjective experience of a “low-grade euphoria “.  It is commonly triggered by specific auditory or visual stimuli, and less commonly by intentional attention control.  Some examples of ASMR “triggers” include:  a whispering voice, quiet, repetitive sounds such as turning book pages, tapping nails onto surfaces such as plastic or wood, and hand movements.  For those of you familiar with the reference, a prime example to me is listening to the painter Bob Ross talk while he paints on his old TV shows.

To tie ASMR to mental health, there are thoughts that ASMR can be helpful for depression and general mental well-being, among other things.  Again, as I noted above, there is not a lot of scientific evidence to support ASMR at this time, but based on experiences (and the millions of ASMR videos online), it appears that ASMR can provide some benefit.

How about you?  Are you familiar with ASMR?  Do you relate to the description of ASMR that I discussed above?  I know this topic has me intrigued, and I look forward to learning more about its benefits and applications.

In today’s entry, I want to talk about another mental health organization that is out there making a difference.  The organization is called Stamp Out Stigma, and most of my information comes from their website at stampoutstigma.com

Their mission includes the following: challenging all of us to change the shape of mental health and addiction dialogue from a whisper to a conversation, recognizing the high prevalence of mental illness and substance use disorders, and reeducating ourselves, family, and friends on the truths of mental illness and addiction.  When these things happen we can help to reduce stigma.

At Stamp Out Stigma, the goal is to change perceptions, reduce stigma, and encourage people to talk about mental illness and substance use disorders.  Some of the ways they do this are through taking a pledge, sharing stories, showing support, and educating people.

In the pledge, The Three Rs are discussed – recognize, reeducate, and reduce.  Stamp Out Stigma also has wristbands that you can order and wear to show support.  In addition, there are videos, resources, and links that can help educate visitors to the website.  Overall, it is an easy website to explore and learn more about mental illness and substance use disorders.

In my opinion, I am glad to see Stamp Out Stigma, and it is interesting to note there are several big companies that support it as well.  While the number of those who have taken the pledge currently seems small to me, it is a start and I anticipate that the number will grow at a faster rate than it has in the past. 

How about you?  Have you heard of Stamp Out Stigma?  Are you interested in learning more?  Will you consider taking their pledge?  I have already taken the pledge, and I hope that all of you will consider doing the same.       

Hello everyone – I wanted to let you know that I have decided to change the frequency of my posts yet again.  Instead of weekly, I am now going to post monthly.  While I certainly have not written all there is to know about mental health, I feel like this pace will be more sustainable and interesting for me and those that read my blog.  Posts will not necessarily be the same day of the month, but there should be at least one entry a month.  Thank you for your support and for reading my blog. 

As I sit down to write today’s entry, I am having a serious lack of motivation.  I feel like I have a lot of other things to get to, and my heart is not entirely into the focus and concentration I need to create this post.

Of course, writing is not the only thing that can get discouraging at times.  When I think about all of the issues related to mental health, stigma, and how it intersects with other parts of life, I can lose my drive and passion for the topic.  Sometimes it gets old.  Sometimes it gets boring.  Sometimes I wish I didn’t feel like I had to say the same thing over and over again.  However, I am only human, and we can’t always be driven every moment of every day.

Yet here I am.  I may not be writing much of substance today, but I am here.  I am moving forward.  I am trying to share something relevant.  I am being real.  I am sharing the fact that being passionate or caring about something is not always easy.  This is probably not news to anyone, but it is good to have that reminder every once in awhile.  Essentially, I am persisting.

So, while today is definitely not my best day when it comes to advocating for mental health, I am still here.  Sometimes that is all I can do, and that is ok.  And, as far as I can see, I will continue to be here, writing and speaking and doing whatever I can to help others.  My hope is that while every day is different, I still have something to contribute, however small that may be.

How about you?  Are you passionate about mental health?  Does the topic ever get boring to you?  Tiring?  Overwhelming?  How do you persist in the fight against stigma?

As I write this entry, we are at the beginning of Mental Health Month, which is held in May.  This year, NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) has a theme of WhyCare?, and more information can be found here: https://www.nami.org/Get-Involved/Awareness-Events/Why-Care 

Of course, this theme has gotten me to thinking about why I care, so I wanted to discuss this in further detail today.  There are so many reasons why I care, but I will highlight the ones that stand out to me on this day.  Here they are:

I care because I lost my dad to suicide, and I wish that no other family has to go through what we did

I care because it breaks my heart to think of the suffering that my dad experienced, and I believe no one should suffer in that way

I care because I lost two cousins to suicide, and I wish that no other family has to experience that kind of loss

I care because I know how hard it was to find people who did care when my dad was sick, and that cannot continue

I care because I worry about the mental health of all of the suicide loss survivors in my family

I care because I worry about the mental health of our children

I care because I worry about the mental health of every human being

I care because I know that as fellow human beings we can do better when it comes to taking care of our mental health

I care because I know we have a lot of education and advocacy that needs to be done around mental health

I care because I know that mental health touches every other issue (homelessness, hunger, literacy, etc.) out there

I have listed 10 reasons that I care, but I could go on and on.  Once you feel the impact of mental illness, it is hard to walk away from caring.

How about you?  Why do you care?  Whether it is May or not, it is important to reflect on why you care about mental health, because it helps guide you on what you can do to help.

In the past few months I have heard and read about some possible link between hormonal contraceptives (a type of birth control) and depression.  Today I would like to explore that in a little more detail. 

I did a quick internet search on the topic, and there are a variety of articles out there that suggest that there is a link between hormonal contraceptives and depression.  However, I can not necessarily vouch for the quality of the information that is being presented, because I am not sure how much of this comes from reputable sources.   That being said, there may be some valid evidence of this link, but we can also think about it from a more theoretical viewpoint.

What are hormonal contraceptives, after all?  Well, they contain some combination of estrogen and/or progesterone hormones.  We also know that hormonal changes may be a cause of depression.  So, from a basic standpoint, it makes sense that taking hormones could lead to hormonal changes.  In turn, these hormonal changes could factor into a depression.  Besides the basic idea of hormonal changes, hormonal contraceptives may also affect the body in other ways that might lead to a depression.  So, regardless of any clinical data, it makes sense to me to at least consider the fact that taking hormonal contraceptives could lead to a depression.  Taking it even further, hormonal contraceptives may also interact with other vitamins, medicines, etc., and that could cause issues as well.  The different possible scenarios really start to add up.

What do you think?  Do you believe there could be a link between hormonal contraceptives and depression?  Do you need to see more hard clinical evidence?  Have you ever experienced someone who seemed to have depression after being on hormonal contraceptives?  Overall, I think it is important to research this topic in more depth.

As I write this post, I have finished my first week at a new job.  This job is unique for me in that I have joined a company that is literally starting from scratch.  As you can imagine, this provides for some challenges and some exciting opportunities as we start to build and grow. 

Even though this new job has come with the luxury of gradually easing into it so far, starting something new can be overwhelming and exhausting.  For me, it signifies a whole new routine, and that has taken a lot for my brain to process.  Honestly, figuring out what to take for lunch and what to pack have required a lot of energy.  It sounds like these should be relatively simple tasks, but it has shown me how much effort can go into changing routines. 

For someone touched by depression in some way, it is no doubt an overwhelming experience when it happens.  Habits and routines are changed, and it can definitely be exhausting.  And, for the most part, the changes are not welcome.  Change can be tough even if it is a positive change, so the changes that depression brings can be devastating.

I think it is important to realize that like a diagnosis of heart disease or cancer, a diagnosis of depression can be overwhelming to all affected.  This likely can lead to anxiety and exhaustion as everyone tries to figure out their “new normal”.  Overall, no matter what the diagnosis, we need to be empathetic to all people facing these changes.  And, in general, we should be kind to everyone, because we usually do not know the struggles or changes that everyone is facing in their lives.

How about you?  What changes have you experienced as the result of a personal diagnosis or diagnosis of someone you know?  Was it overwhelming at first?  Did it get easier over time?  My hope is that we can always try to be more understanding of how change affects people.

Currently in my church we have been talking about the “wilderness” in our lives.   Each week, a story from the Bible is used to illustrate a different wilderness that people faced and how they went through it.  Today I want to touch on both the wilderness in my life and how depression could be considered a wilderness.

Depending on who you ask, wilderness can mean many things to many people.  Basically, I have thought about wilderness mostly as something that happens outdoors.  But, there is a deeper meaning, one that can involve a range of emotions and experiences.  Wilderness can be a time of great uncertainty and anxiety.  It can also be a time of confusion.  On the other hand, wilderness can represent a time of great opportunity and positive change.  It can also be a time of growth.  Overall, what sticks out to me is how uncertain the wilderness can be – it’s getting comfortable with being uncomfortable, and I think for most of us that is a big challenge.

In my own life, wilderness is definitely happening.  I have some uncertainty about my career, my finances, and my health, and that is only the first three that I thought of while writing this.  And, I wonder – has there ever been a time in my life that was completely certain?  Is wilderness always present in our lives?

I also think that depression must be a particular type of wilderness.  I can only imagine how uncertain and anxious a depression must be, and it almost has to be uncomfortable.  I think that the wilderness of depression has to be tougher than the wilderness that many of us face, and it comes with even more challenges that I would not know how to describe here.

Have you ever thought about the “wilderness” in your life?  What uncertainties are you currently facing?  Have you always had times of uncertainty in your life?