Category: Social

Disabling Depression

In my last entry, I did a general review of the Mental Health First Aid class that I took that day.  Today, I want to discuss the one item I learned that I think will profoundly stay with me as I continue to learn more about and discuss depression.

In the class, we talked about how mental illness can be disabling.  Here, disabling was defined as something that impairs your ability to work, carry out activities of daily living, or have satisfying relationships.  Working from that definition, you can start to see how mental illnesses can be just as disabling as physical ailments.  In fact, the statement that got to me was that severe depression is just as disabling as quadriplegia (quadriplegia is when all of your limbs are paralyzed).

Wow.

Severe depression is just as disabling as quadriplegia?

But it didn’t take long to realize just how true that statement is, and it blew me away.  It made me think back to my dad, who would literally lie in bed all day and hardly move at all – it was as if he were paralyzed from the neck down.  Then, once I started thinking about it, I felt awful thinking that is what my dad went through.  Of course, this has happened and is happening to others too.  Regardless of whether someone has either quadriplegia or depression, they can both cause a paralysis that is incredibly devastating and disabling.

What do you think?  Do you agree with the statement that severe depression is just as disabling as quadriplegia?  If so, does that help you to better understand depression, whether it affects you personally or as someone who cares for someone with depression?  Indeed, I think it will stick with me, and it is helpful for anyone to understand how tough depression can be.

Sharing Your Story

We all have a story to tell.  Our lives are full of ups and downs and twists and turns.  Among all of that, there is much to learn along the way.  If you have or have had depression, have you considered sharing your story with others?  I know that can be asking for a lot, and it is ok if you choose not to share your experience.  However, if you feel so inclined, I think sharing your depression story can be very helpful to others.

Today I shared my story of depression with some co-workers as part of a presentation on mental health.  I talked about how my dad struggled with depression and how it affected him, me, and our relationship.  It never seems to get any easier when I tell people that my dad was a victim of suicide.  But, after I share my story I feel better knowing that by sharing I might have helped another person understand they are not alone.  Or, by speaking out I have helped another find the courage to ask for help.  To me, sharing your story also helps people understand depression better and how it affects others.  The more people understand, the less they fear, and this can help reduce the stigma that is associated with depression and mental illness.

One organization that is really bringing this concept to light is called This Is My Brave, and they can be found online here: thisismybrave.org  This is definitely a very public way to share, but I encourage you to check out the website and also look to see what others have already shared.  I am sure there are many other ways to share out there, but my hope is that you understand the power and inspiration that your story can convey.  If now is not the right time to share, maybe another time will be.  And, the audience can range from one to millions, but the power of sharing is there no matter what form it may take.

Homelessness

Depression does not discriminate.  It affects everyone without regard to religion, culture, age, and gender, among many other categories.  Although depression is everywhere, today I want to focus on depression and homelessness, which can include many of its own challenges.

According to NAMI, around 26% of homeless adults staying in shelters live with serious mental illness.  Around 46% live with severe mental illness and/or substance use disorders.  This comprises a large number of the homeless population.  And you may wonder, what comes first?  Does someone with mental illness end up homeless, or does homelessness lead to things such as depression?  I am not sure if there is any solid data on it, but my guess is that it goes both ways.  To me, homelessness is a huge stress that may just lead to depression.  However, if you are so depressed you can’t get out of bed, you may end up getting kicked out of your living space.  Regardless, this is a serious concern.

Unfortunately, I can’t do justice when speaking about this topic, because although I think I might know what is going on, I may be very wrong.  What I do know, though, is that depression (or any mental illness) and homelessness requires more help.  How do we attend to their mental health needs when more basic needs are not being met?  Will the mental illness be improved by helping with basic needs?  There are a lot of concerns here, and I struggle to know what the answers are.  However, an important piece is to understand how prevalent this issue is.  Once we realize how much this is happening, we can start to talk about it and come up with solutions.

What do you think?  Did you realize there was so much mental illness in the homeless population?  What are your thoughts on how we can help this group of people?

Connections

When someone is depressed, that depression is connected to everything about the person.  It can affect what they do, where they go, how they feel, who they interact with, and many other factors.  Although depression does not and should not define a person, it will be tied to the person who is suffering from it.  Anyone else who is around that person will also feel a connection to the depression, but it might be felt in a variety of different ways.  The main point here is that depression has connections, whether someone wants them or not.

But there is good news.  When you really start to think about it, everything is connected.  This could involve a deeper philosophical conversation, but to keep it somewhat simple it is sufficient enough to say we are all connected as humans and what goes on in the world.  So, from that, if depression can be connected, then happy thoughts and actions are also connected.  If someone is depressed, seeing or hearing about a happy event can give that person connections to happier thoughts.

Of course, someone who is depressed may end up feeling even sadder that they could not experience the happiness for themselves or that they simply cannot feel much at all.  That is understandable.  But, the very act of witnessing or being exposed to happy thoughts creates a connection that can be so important.  It may not appear to help much in the moment, but the more happy and meaningful connections that can be made for a depressed person, the more a benefit is possible.

I understand this may all sound pretty vague, but overall the idea is that depressed people should be as connected to as much happiness and meaning as possible.  It may not be the absolute ticket to recovery, but it can help expose the depressed person to a more helpful way of experiencing life.

How to Talk to a Depressed Person

As you can imagine, anytime I see an article or video about depression I am curious.  Lately, it seems I have been hearing a lot about the stories of people who have experienced depression.  In what I have heard, one of the big themes that has come up is how depressed people want to be treated, and that is what I would like to touch on today.

While I will make some generalizations here, it should be noted that not everyone will agree.  However, I also think these are some good rules of thumb to use at first, and then you can modify your behavior from there if needed.

The answer to how to talk to a depressed person is pretty simple.  How would you talk to someone who has a broken leg?  How would you talk to someone who has cancer?  How would you want someone to talk to you?  The answer to those questions is the same as how you would talk to someone with depression.  From what I have heard, depressed people want to be included, just like anyone else.  They also want to feel like they can contribute, so asking them for favors is not out of the question.  They may not feel up to those actions, but asking alone can be helpful for depressed individuals.  A couple of other tips: first, don’t tell them to cheer up, and second, don’t stay away from them.  Your connection is important, and depression is not contagious.

As you have noticed, talking to a depressed person does not have to be any different from talking to anyone else.  In fact, there are probably many times that you have talked to someone who is depressed and you didn’t even know that fact about them.  In the end, treat a depressed person like anyone else – they are no different than someone who has a physical condition.

NAMI

When dealing with depression, resources are important.  Today I would like to highlight a resource that I know fairly well – NAMI (also known as the National Alliance for Mental Illness).  NAMI is an organization in the United States that works at 3 levels – the national, state, and local level.  NAMI is found in almost every state, and there are many local chapters.  The main work of NAMI revolves around education, advocacy, and support.

Education includes classes that are free for students.  There are classes for those affected by mental illness.  There are also classes for family members, veterans, young people, and health care providers.  Essentially, there is usually something available no matter what your role in mental illness may be.

For advocacy, work is done at all levels to pass legislation to help improve mental health.  Other advocacy work, which can involve speaking at press conferences or public events, can help to reduce stigma and increase conversations about mental health.

Next, support can include things such as providing resources and helping people know where they can get help.  As you may guess, these three activities don’t always work alone – education, advocacy, and support can be found together in a lot of what NAMI does.

Overall, I feel that NAMI is a great organization when it comes to mental health.  I have benefitted from its help over the years, and I continue to be a member and supporter of it.  If you are interested in learning more about NAMI I encourage you to go to their website at www.nami.org  Many state and local chapters have websites that can be found by a simple Google search.  For a fee you can become a member, and there are reduced fees for those with limited means.  Even if you don’t become a member, I hope you at least take a look at the group to see how they might be helpful for you.

Causes of Depression

What causes depression?  That is a big question.  No doubt many of you have heard about there being a “chemical imbalance” in the brain, and maybe genetics was thrown in there as well.  Today, I want to give a general overview of some other theories that may explain what can lead to depression.

While there may be some truth to the genetics cause, the “chemical imbalance” doesn’t seem to be as likely, however, it cannot be completely eliminated.  Here is a listing of some other ideas:

1.Depression can result from an inflammatory/infection/immune reaction process

2.Depression can result from a hormone imbalance

3.Depression can result from a “leaky gut”, which is related to the food that we eat

4.Depression can result from losing our connection to important things in our life such as our values, face to face interactions with others, etc.

5.Depression can result from toxicity and/or environmental exposures

6.Depression can result from trauma that is experienced

7.Depression can result from taking medications

8.Depression can result from the food that we eat

As you can see, this is a fairly good sized list, and I probably have not captured all of the possible theories out there.  And, it seems likely that there are several components that go into causing depression, not just one thing.  That makes it harder to understand who will or will not have depression, but it is helpful to understand that depression is a lot more complicated than what we might have thought in the past.  While we may not understand the exact combination leading to depression (and it probably is different for every individual), these theories give us so many more options to pursue when treating depression, and I think that is important.  It may take a lot more trial and error, but hopefully there are some answers here that work better when medications don’t work and/or don’t seem like a good option.

Advocating for Mental Health

My family has had a history of depression.  Some of the details have been discussed in earlier blog posts, and I am not going to explain any more about it at this time.  However, I know what it means to live with someone who is depressed.  Although arguably not as awful as having depression yourself, being a family member of someone who is depressed is pretty hard too.  Currently I am not in that situation, but I know it could happen to anyone at any time.  Depression does not care who you are.

All of that being said, there is so much work to do to make mental health (including depression) a priority in our society.  Over the years I have become very involved with NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness), and today we had a Day on the Hill where we advocated for mental health issues at the state capitol building.  Advocacy is not my strong suit, but I feel it has become an important piece for me.  There are so many people struggling, and unfortunately a lot of things will not happen unless they are mandated by law.  I also feel compelled to advocate for those who cannot.  Sadly, there are people that are ill enough that they can’t advocate.  Family members may be able to, but a lot of times they are struggling to keep up with life and don’t have the time to get out there.  Someone has to make these issues heard, and I want to help.

If you would like to learn more about NAMI and its advocacy efforts, here is a link: www.nami.org

Most importantly, my hope is that people with mental illness know that there are lot of people who care.  Sometimes, even when the legislation doesn’t get passed, that can be a comforting thought.

It Takes a Village

My son is still very young, but almost every day I think about the people that contribute to his growth and well-being.  There is no need to list everyone I can think of here, but that list will also get bigger as he gets older.  Regardless of who is on that list, I definitely believe in the saying that “it takes a village to raise a child”.

Where did this saying come from?  There was a book written by Hillary Clinton in the 1990s, however, the saying was around long before that.  Supposedly, it comes from the African continent, but that has been debated.  In any case, it is something to consider if you are a parent.

For me, I think it is important to both the parent(s) and child that there are multiple people in the child’s life.  To me, children need to learn that they can depend on others.  There is just too much pressure for a parent and a child if one makes the other person his or her entire world.  Even for single parents, it is important to understand that you cannot do it all alone.  You need support, and your child should be introduced to other members of the community that will be a part of their lives as they grow and become adults.

If you are a parent, does your child (or children) have a “village” that surrounds them?  If not, are there people you can add to create a village for them?  If you already have some outside support for your children, could you use more?  Your village is probably changing from time to time, but hopefully you can periodically reflect on your child’s village and see if any adjustments need to be made.  Together, we can all work to help raise our children.  There is no reason you have to go it alone.

Card Shopping

The other day I decided I needed to pick up some cards for various occasions.  And, when I actually have the time to do so, I can spend a lot of time looking at cards.  I used to get “just because” and “thinking of you” cards all of the time when I was younger, because I loved giving and sending cards.  When I look back on it, I guess you could say it was a hobby of mine.

Why did I enjoy shopping for and giving cards – and still do?  I suppose I like the idea of sharing my feelings by conveying a funny or touching message.  I am always impressed by how many cards make me laugh or make me feel good by just reading them.  I can tell people the same things that are found in cards, but I think it is nice to have a tangible piece of paper to go with it.  Something to keep as a reminder that you were thought of on a certain occasion.

I have sometimes wished that I could be a greeting card writer.  How fun would that be to create things that make people feel good?  However, ultimately it probably takes a lot of effort to make a few great cards out of a lot of bad ones.

How about you?  Do you like looking at and shopping for greeting cards?  Do you like giving and sending cards?  Do you like receiving cards?  Participating in any of these activities can be an easy and simple way to connect with others.  Of course, there are greeting cards online, so if you have internet you don’t even have to leave home to send them.  My hope is that even if you don’t send cards, perhaps you can think about and/or find ways to let people know that you are thinking about them.